How to Keep Negative Emotions Contained

Опубликовал Admin
16-01-2021, 22:30
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Everyone experiences negative emotions. Feeling angry, sad, or disappointed is part of the human experience. These emotions are just as important as positive emotions but often require a little more effort to contain and then process them in a healthy manner. Being mindful of negative emotions and learning how to respond to and process negative emotions effectively will help you see these feelings in a new light.

Containing a Negative Emotion in the Moment

  1. Don’t react immediately. When you are in a situation that triggers a negative emotion, don’t react right away! Instead, try taking several deep breaths before reacting. If you don’t feel calmer after several breaths, you can continue breathing deeply for several minutes until you feel calm enough to address the situation. Some other things you can try include:
    • Going into a different rom for a few minutes.
    • Counting to 10.
    • Listening to some soothing music.
    • Going for a walk.
  2. Excuse yourself from the situation. Sometimes the best strategy for keeping a negative emotion contained in the moment is to temporarily remove yourself from the situation. For example, if your co-worker insults you at work, kindly excuse yourself and take a moment to go to the bathroom or grab a drink of water. This will allow you to temporarily disconnect from the situation and gain some composure.
  3. Breathe deeply. When you encounter a situation that evokes intense emotion like crying, taking a few moments to breathe deeply can help you contain your emotions. For example, if you see your ex-boyfriend out at the movies with another man, try breathing deeply for at least five breaths. This will help you contain your negative emotions in the moment so that you don’t do something you might regret such as lashing at him or his new boyfriend.
  4. Think about something else. Shifting the focus of your attention to something other than the person or situation that is causing you to feel a negative emotion can help you control unwanted emotional reactions or outbursts. For example, if you find yourself furious at your boss’s behavior try thinking about the wonderful weekend you have planned with your wife and children. This will help deflect the negative emotion in the moment so you can focus on accomplishing your goals for the rest of the work day.
  5. Control your response. You can’t change how you feel about a situation, but you can shift your response. For example, instead of reacting to your co-worker’s insult with one of your own, try smiling and asking them to clarify what they meant by their statement. Instead of yelling at whomever left their socks on the steps again, try calmly saying, “Somebody left their socks on the stairs again and caused me to fall. Can you please come pick them up?”

Acknowledging Negative Emotions

  1. Acknowledge and name the emotion. The first part of dealing with a negative emotion is to recognize it. Sweeping it under the rug or repeatedly brushing it off will prevent you from handling the emotion effectively. When you experience a negative emotion, take a piece of paper and write it down or say it aloud. Try saying or writing, “I am angry.”
    • If you have a hard time identifying the emotion you are having, try looking at a list of different emotions to help you figure out what you are experiencing.
  2. Recognize how the emotion is affecting you. Negative emotions often affect our behavior and thought processes in negative ways. Think deeply about your behavior and how the negative emotion is affecting it. For example, you might yell at your child because you are feeling anger toward your boss.
    • Sit down with a piece of paper and pencil. Make a list of all the ways the negative emotions you are experiencing affect your behavior, thought processes, and relationships with others.
  3. Acknowledge the cause of the emotion. In order to effectively manage negative emotions, you must be mindful of what is causing you to feel a particular way. Identifying the root of the emotion is key to processing it and moving forward. Don’t blame someone else or yourself for the emotion. Just acknowledge the cause or causes of why you’re feeling a particular way.
    • Keep in mind that it is okay to guess at one cause or multiple causes when you are having an emotion. Practice attributing your emotions and it will become easier to identify the causes over time.

Processing Negative Emotions Effectively

  1. Recognize the emotion is temporary. Everyone experiences negative emotions on a regular basis. It’s part of being human. Understanding that your anger, sadness, or rage is temporary and will not last forever is a critical step in processing negative emotions in a healthy manner.
    • If you feel overwhelmed with anger, try saying to yourself, “I am very angry at my husband right now, but I know this anger is not permanent.”
  2. Set aside time to process the negative emotion. Sometimes you have to give yourself time and space to effectively process negative emotions. This could be as simple as taking a walk during lunch after your boss upsets you, or soaking in a long, hot bath while crying about your best friend’s bad behavior. Whatever the activity, be sure you let yourself feel the range of emotions associated with a particular person, event, or situation.
  3. Accept your negative emotions. Understand that negative emotions are as much a part of the human experience as are positive emotions. Don’t try to bottle them up or ignore them. Accept your anger, sadness, rage, or grief as part of your journey as a human. Try telling yourself that this emotion is exactly what you need to be feeling at this particular moment in time.
  4. Talk to someone you trust. Having a person you can confide in will help you respond to negative emotions in a healthy manner. Instead of reacting immediately to the nasty email you received from a family member, try calling your best friend instead. Talk to them about what you are feeling and what is causing the negative emotion. Having a second opinion will broaden your perspective on the situation and help you respond in a more controlled manner.
  5. Find an outlet for your negative emotions. Having a healthy outlet can help you manage your emotions. Your outlet can be a journal in which you write about your emotional experiences or a kickboxing class where you let go of your anger through a high intensity workout. Whatever the medium find an activity that will help you process and manage your emotions in a healthy way.
    • Try going for a run or long walk the next time you feel angry about work. Exercise can raise your dopamine levels and boost your mood.
    • The next time you feel sad, try turning on your favorite album and singing at the top of your lungs.
  6. Keep the bigger picture in perspective. It’s easy to get wrapped up in your emotions and let them dictate even the tiniest parts of your life. Understanding that how you’re feeling today and that the events or situations that facilitated these emotions are part of the bigger picture of your life will help you gain some perspective.

Tips

  • Try investing in a journal if you regularly experience negative emotions. Writing down your feelings can help you become more aware of how you feel and why, which can help you calm down and respond to how you are feeling more rationally.
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