How to Build a Relationship With a Dog

Kneel to the dog’s level. When approaching a dog, always do so from the side and not from the front, which can seem aggressive. Get down to their level and face the same direction as them- this will prevent them from seeing you as confrontational. Avoid eye contact and let the dog get comfortable with having you in its space. When showing affection, kneeling to be at the same height as your dog demonstrates trust, equality, and connection.

Let the dog come to you. To ear a dog's trust, always respect its space and let it come to you. Avoid petting a dog without it sniffing your hand or prompting you first; if the dog gives you such a cue, pet its chest, and avoid petting it at any angle from above. Prioritize the dog’s comfort and move slowly.

Feed the dog by hand. A good way to earn a dog’s trust is to feed it by hand. Crouch to the dog’s level and place its food in the palm of your hand, holding it out while avoiding eye contact. The bonding exercise of feeding a dog in this way will build its trust in you, as a caring provider.

• If the dog is too afraid to eat from your hand, start by placing the food in front of it and slowly work up to having the dog eat out of your hand.

Introduce basic obedience commands. Choose a spot that your dog is familiar with, and that has very few distractions, to start training. Start with short, fifteen minute sessions to avoid overwhelming the dog. Illustrate commands with gestures and reward your dog's success at following commands with praise, treats, and other positive reinforcement.

Expand the obedience training. Once your dog is skilled at a few basic obedience commands (e.g. "sit", "stay" and "lie down"), practice these commands in areas with more distractions. This may seem repetitive or unnecessary, but it is an important step to ensure that your dog understands these commands beyond the environment it learned them in. For obedience training that is environment-specific (i.e. staying seated in the car), it is important to practice with your dog in that specific context.

Employ low-stress negative reinforcement. Discouraging bad behavior is important, but it is more important to avoid instilling fear or distrust in a dog. Avoid any measures that use intimidation or harm to get a dog to behave (e.g. hitting it, dragging it by the leash, using a shock collar).To convey your disapproval, use a strong, firm tone of voice and employ low-stress negative reinforcement - as a punishment, take something away from your dog, like a treat or toy. Dogs naturally seek guidance, which is better conveyed by confident leadership than by aggressive reinforcement.

Be consistent. Dogs learn through the repeated process of commands and consequences, so it is important to stay consistent on this front. Commands, non-verbal communication, and rewards should stay the same to create a foundation of trust and obedience. Always be as clear and direct as possible, and try to establish a regular schedule and procedure for training, eating, grooming, and so on.

Play with the dog regularly. With humans and dogs alike, having fun together builds friendship and loyalty. Make a point of playing with the dog on a regular basis and, in turn, build up the positive associations it has with you. Some fun games or activities to try are:

• playing fetch, a classic game that builds a dog’s sense of purpose
• hide and seek, a game fueled by a dog’s desire to find you (a reflection on its bond with you)

Pet the dog regularly. Once a dog has accepted your petting and shown you affection, it is important to show it affection regularly to keep up the bond. Given the largely non-verbal nature of the human-dog relationship, physical interaction plays a huge role in bonding. Petting and grooming are affectionate ways to show a dog how important it is to you, and are thought to reduce stress in dogs and humans alike.

Walk your dog in areas that it prefers. Observe your dog's preferences for particular environments; for instance, your dog may seem especially energetic and playful during walks in the park, but sullen and lethargic during walks on busy, city streets. Be mindful and considerate of these preferences and accommodate the dog accordingly. Choosing to walk your dog in areas it feels most comfortable in will result in a happier pet and better bonding time for the two of you.

Respect your dog's dislikes. If your dog expresses a clear dislike for something (by whining, crying, fidgeting, or barking), avoid it in the future if possible. For example, if you dress your dog in a costume or unnecessary clothing and it expresses clear discomfort, don't do it again. Showing respect for its comfort and preferences will show that you can keep your dog happy, and strengthen its trust in you.