How to Live in a Family Crisis

Опубликовал Admin
13-11-2016, 10:00
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Whether someone in your family has been taken to the hospital, the family provider has lost his/her job, or arguments and fighting in your family are growing faster than you like, no one wants to live in a family crisis. However, there are ways to cope with the situation, and sometimes ways to fix it. This article will help you adjust and continue your life after a family crisis.

Steps

  1. Take some time to accept that someone is gone, whether to the hospital or the afterlife.
    • This can be difficult, especially if your previous coping method was to ignore the issue, but in order to heal you have to acknowledge that you are wounded.
    • Don't forget grieving is healthy, but don't dwell on the problem.  Accept what has happened but don't mope around feeling sorry for yourself all day.
  2. Analyze your power over the situation.
    • Decide what you can do to fix the issue.  Be completely honest with yourself.  Sometimes it can help to come up with ridiculous ideas to soothe yourself (I could summon a genie who would cure her and bring her back home).
    • Accept what you can't do.  Be honest about this, as well.  You aren't perfect, but that's okay.
  3. Take a look at the things you can do, and decide which ones are reasonable.
    • Think about the limitations of time, money, and space.
    • Think about what you are willing to do.
    • Think about what is required for each step, including people and materials.
  4. Make a plan for mending what you can.
    • This should follow the same rules as making goals.
    • Be specific about when, where, how, what, and even why.
    • Share the plan with people you trust and who can help.
  5. Follow through with the plan.
    • Work on your goals, one step at a time.
    • Be willing to adjust your plan, whether by taking away a step or adding more.
  6. Ask for support where needed.
    • Ask your parents or siblings for help if you are comfortable with that.
    • Ask your friends to lend a hand where needed.
    • Don't go to video games, drugs, food, or any other unhealthy addiction for the support that you need.  This will cause lasting problems that you will most likely regret later.
  7. Continue to take time every now and then to grieve.
    • The amount and frequency of time spent here will vary.
    • Don't overwhelm yourself.
  8. Comfort other family members and help them out.
    • This will significantly help them, especially if they are younger.
    • This can also help you.
  9. Journal or create other art representing the hardship.
    • This can help you remember it without getting depressed.
    • Art and journals are very precious after a family crisis.
  10. If people are arguing, try not to pick sides.
    • This can lead to one side feeling hurt and abandoned while the other feels rewarded and appreciated.
    • This is especially hard if you have an opinion in the matter.
    • Try to express your opinion without implying that you love one person over the other.
  11. Accept that what has happened has happened (or is happening), and move on.
    • Adapt your life as necessary, but don't let the hardship take complete control.
    • Write letters to family members who have moved out, or even to those who have passed away if it helps.

Tips

  • Remember that your actions affect other people.
  • Put on a good face, but be sure to let your true self show to your close friends.
  • If the details of the family crisis are supposed to be left secret, talk with your parents about telling your best friend. Have your best friend promise not to share the problem with others.

Warnings

  • Don't put the blame on anyone. Most likely the person you feel is responsible feels the same way and feels very guilty.
  • Don't pretend that telling someone will make you weak. This is not true. Everybody needs a confident.
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