How to Like Yourself Just As You Are Right Now

Опубликовал Admin
9-11-2016, 10:30
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There are times in our life when we feel down, stuck, miserable, apathetic and full of self-hatred. Most people have down days where they question their lives, who they are what they do, where they are going, etc. Find a person who is always upbeat and optimistic and the chances are that you'll want to strangle them if you spend too much time in their company! Optimism is good, but realism often helps us more.

Steps

  1. Accept that feeling low and fed-up is something that happens to most of us. (Do not confuse clinical depression with times when you feel down, sad or fed-up. If your low moods are continuous then you really should seek medical advice.)
  2. Tell yourself that it is actually OK and quite normal to become apathetic, bored, miserable, unhappy etc for some of your life. We all have to deal with bad times and the bad moods which often follow them.
  3. Go with your mood. Embrace it! But don't feel you have to cling to it. Acknowledge that today isn't a good day, but it isn't the end of the world. We all go through bad times, we all have times when we don't feel happy, involved, loved, satisfied, enough, etc. Sometimes there is an obvious reason for these moods and days, at other times there isn't. We just can't get going, we wallow, we waste time and we think too much. We bring ourselves down. It happens. It doesn't make you a bad person or a failure.
  4. Ask yourself if you want to continue to wallow. Do you want to carry out feeling as you have them? Sometimes, when you hit apathetic days, they can make you feel low and magnify every small problem you have. You may not want to continue this way, so change direction. You don't have to go anywhere but you do have to tell this feeling you are leaving it behind for a while.
  5. Get up. If you haven't been looking after yourself properly, groom yourself. Try cleaning your teeth or brushing your hair. If you are not dressed, put clothes on. Tell yourself that your day will not be completely wasted. This is an affirmation that motivators and coaches loves.
  6. Think about one small thing you can do right now that will keep you busy for a few minutes. It doesn't have to be a massive thing, but it should be something you perhaps should have done today but haven't.
  7. Pledge a few minutes of this dreary day to getting up - away from your keyboard, bed, sofa, TV or game console - and doing this thing. You are going to spend a few minutes trying to achieve whatever you are doing.
  8. Tell yourself that you deserve the very best self-care you can give yourself. You are worth it. Something has brought you down to this lazy, apathetic or sad state and you don't want to be like this any longer today. Make yourself active, for just a minute or two. Jump on the spot, wave your arms around, touch your toes, or do anything for just a few minutes in order to get the blood pumping. Go on. Not for long - just for a couple of minutes. Now, go and put some music on.
  9. Understand that you are up now and you have spent a few minutes trying to achieve a new goal. Let that small bit of momentum carry you forward. Go and be - and again, it only has to be for a few minutes - the best person you can be. If no one else is around, go and smile in the mirror. Force a grin.
  10. Take a deep breath. Consider whether there was anyone or anything in particular that has caused your bad feelings, your apathy, or your sadness. Think about it. If someone else is to blame, try to forgive the person at least temporarily. Put whatever is getting to you out of your mind by saying you refuse to think about it right now.
  11. Plan something for the rest of your day. It doesn't have to be awesome - it just has to be something you are going to do and something that you will better about doing.
  12. Take that one small step towards doing it. Just move towards whatever it is you are going to spend time doing, even if it's something as boring and tedious as the washing-up or clearing something away. You can do this, you can find something to distract you for the next hour or so.
  13. Once you become involved in doing something you'll find your bad mood or sad feelings or just-can't-be-bothered feelings will change. Apathy, and sometimes laziness, can bring us down. Too much time spent doing nothing, but thinking lots, doesn't really help us. Oh, we all need rest. We all need to reflect on things. But who wants to feel useless, miserable, like a failure, pathetic, moody, etc, for too much of their time? Not me.
  14. That is why we have to give ourselves a bit of a kick up the backside sometimes. It goes against all our instincts to move out of that gloomy place. But if we don't learn to kick-start ourselves, life will continue to remain dreary.
  15. There is no overnight miracle cure. There is this moment, right now, when we can change things. Don't look back, don't look forward, just change right now. The only one who can do that is you.

Tips

  • Change direction... You don't have to go anywhere, but you do have to tell this feeling that you are leaving it behind for a while.
  • Think of someone who you love & care about and call them. Just hearing their voice can make your day that much better.
  • Sing! Sing a happy song. It will lift your spirits and get you smiling again.
  • Try to do good deeds like babysitting, getting a job or summer job or maybe even animal care! If you are still a kid (under 18) you may want participate in voluntary work such as working at a club for younger children and arrange an area to have fun. You will feel a sense of accomplishment for doing it, and it allows you to gain new skills and experiences which will be vital for your future. Furthermore, doing good deeds may result in you getting that new book you wanted. This will further add to your feeling of accomplishment.

Warnings

  • Tell yourself that it is actually OK and quite normal to become apathetic, bored, miserable, unhappy, etc, for some of your life. We all have to deal with bad times and the bad moods which often follow them. Just not your whole life. Cheer up.
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